Best Kind of Lost

The Lazy (Wo)Man’s Guide to Koh Lanta

by Noelle

January 27 – February 1

 

Koh Lanta is a southern Thai island, filled with endless potential for adventures: elephant rides, cooking classes, waterfall hikes and a lax natural drug protocol ripe for partying all night long.

If that sounds like what you’re looking for, go ahead and close the browser.

You still with me? Good. Because what we did for 6 full days on Koh Lanta was a whole lot of…nothing.

All it took for this A-type gal with OCD tendencies (but really, who doesn’t like clean counters??) to get down with lazy was for them to forcefully pry her work phone from her cold, dead fingers her to quit her job and travel the world. Now I can totally relax for at least 5 – 7 days without bribing old coworkers to send me emails with phrases like “at your earliest convenience,” and “I look forward to an update on that status,” for weeks at a time. (EDITOR’S NOTE: If excessively cleaning counters is the worst we have to deal with when we get home – you know, being unemployed and all – I think we are in pretty good shape.)

So, without further ado, I bring you, “The Lazy (Wo)Man’s Guide to Koh Lanta:”

1. Spend an afternoon on the idyllic Bamboo Bay Beach. It’s a bit remote, which is what makes it so wonderful. Rocky and sexy, it was by far our favorite spot to take our daily baptism in the Andaman Bay.

2. Set aside a whole day for Kantiang Bay. Start with breakfast taken on a hammock or beanbag at The Drunken Sailor (we recommend the Sunrise Sandwich), then head to the beautiful white sand beach for an afternoon of self-baking. For lunch, stop by Pad Thai Rock & Roll for the best Pad See Ew you’ve had in your life (the Pad Thai ain’t shabby either), cleansing your palate after with an incredibly refreshing fruit smoothie. Head back to the beach for some easy swimming in the blissfully warm waters before grabbing a seat at the Why Not bar for a Chang Beer or two (or whatever). Sunset isn’t great from the beach, but the ambiance (and Changs) make up for the slight. If so inclined, live music starts at 9 p.m.

3. Have dinner at Time for Lime. They have a kick-ass tasting menu that included marinated shrimp wrapped in wild pepper leaves, their signature soup made with pumpkin/lemongrass/onion/red curry paste/lime juice, crispy deep fried papaya, and marinated king fish in a red curry sauce, all which left our palates buzzing. They also offer a full curriculum of cooking courses, but we’ve discussed the Bauer anti-activity agenda, and so we merely reaped the benefits of other’s hard work.

4. Stroll Long Beach at sunset. Better yet, get a blanket and sit your lazy ass down and watch the sun sink below the horizon. You’ll likely have company from one of the beach resort mascots.

5. Wade blissfully into the Andaman Sea at Waterfall Bay. The stunning stretch of sand broken only by a few hotels and bars was the picture of peace. The rocks under feet at the coastline may not make for the best wading, but be patient, fellow lazyman, and you’ll clear the stones and swim to your heart’s content.

6. RENT A MOTORBIKE. This is a must. Must. Must. For approx 250 baht a day (an easy $5 USD), you can cruise the few roads that crisscross the island and glimpse the lush landscape this paradise has to offer.

7. Stop off anywhere along the west coast to catch sunset or just take in the views. Order a smoothie or curry, sip and enjoy.

8. Stop by one of the Long Beach bars at night, settle into a twinkly-light-strung cabana set up with views of the sea and enjoy the most happening “scene” on the island. More specifically, head to Treehouse Bar, just off the beach, as we did with Dave’s friend, Steve, with whom we had the fortune of spending an evening. (EDITOR’S NOTE: And Noelle had the misfortune of sitting through our reminiscing about the high school sports days – we were robbed back in ’03 – but thankfully she is easily distracted by twinkly lights, which were in abundance.)

In related news, pad thai does NOT, in fact, make for good drunk food.

9. Eat at Red Snapper. We actually bunked in one of their bungalows for the week, but their food draws people from around the island. Despite being one of the more expensive options around, after filling our bellies with menu items like spicy crab croquettes, red roasted pork tenderloin with fried chorizo, jalapeño cream and coriander vinaigrette and a smoked salmon with kalamata olives and horseradish beet root cream (all by recommendation from the chef, who earned our slavish devotion after the first course), we couldn’t resist an encore visit.

10. Have dinner in Old Town. On the eastern shores of the island, it’s really the main access to the East Coast for tourists. The views over the seas as you amble along the wooden docks make for a pretty setting, and there are tons of cute restaurants perched along the coast.

So there you have it. 10 ways to do nothing in Koh Lanta. We loved everything about it, even what I’ve dubbed “island logic” that we found everywhere. Example: We had the exact same breakfast at the same place 3 separate times and the bill came to 3 different totals. Island. Logic.

Absolutely a must visit during a trip to Southern Thailand. Even midday on the most crowded spot on the island (Long Beach) at high season, we were shocked at the lack of tourist crush that so often plagues the Thai islands. In some of the more remote bays, we practically had the beaches to ourselves.

So run – don’t walk – to Koh Lanta. Leave the laziness for your arrival.

Bangkok: Our Thailand Turnstile and Urban Oasis

by Dave

January 22 – 26

 

Bangkok is an interesting place. With such a massive sprawl, it can at times seem like multiple smaller cities squished together, each with its own demographics, personality and feel.

We had three separate stays in Bangkok throughout our 37 days in Thailand – twice by necessity (as we quickly found that everything routes through Bangkok), and once by choice and for a visit from a special guest.

It had been a long time since we’d gotten some in-person QT with a member of the Bauer family. Nearly nine months actually. So when we found out my dad would be coming through Bangkok for a work trip, we synced up our schedules to make sure we’d overlap in Thailand’s bustling capital city. Our stay with him could not have been more different than our first time through the city weeks earlier.

During that first stop through, we stayed in a hostel in the backpacker mecca that is Khao San Rd. If you’re backpacking on the cheap through SE Asia, odds are at some point you’ll be making the obligatory stop here. It’s inexpensive, it’s an easy place to meet other travelers (and drink underage, a bonus if we were like, you know, born a decade later…), and you pretty much can’t walk down the street without tripping over a cheap pad thai or beer deal. That, and the hip hop and techno pouring out of the bars. Oh, and the dreadlocks. And the tattoos.

Noelle and I have no ink, we skipped our windows of life where dreadlocks would have been dismissed as a phase (whereas if we had them now, there would be reason to worry about where things went off the rails) and we haven’t been ones to indulge in techno-playing bars and clubs in the past nine months. So while we didn’t have a particularly bad experience on the whole, it’s not a place we’re itching to return to.

Fast forward a few weeks and we’re now across town staying in the Sukhumvit neighborhood. Fresh off what had just been our seventh overnight bus in the past two months, we were ready for the R&R that awaited us at the heavenly oasis more commonly known by it’s actual name – the JW Marriott Bangkok. Where do I begin…

We arrive at 8am expecting to bum around the lobby while the room is being made up, but of course it’s already ready for check-in. We assumed my dad would be in a morning meeting, but it turns out he’s able to duck away to immediately meet us for coffee. Where do we get this coffee? Why, the (chin pushed out, adjusting the knot of my kerchief-matching tie as I say this) Executive Lounge, of course.

 

Because Monty.

 

Yup, the old man’s still got it. Jokes aside, guys like my dad travel a TON for work and all those miles flown and hotel nights over the years have the nice perk of access to said lounges in these hotels.

Then you have the leeches beneficiaries like Noelle and I, and we were like kids in professional Disneyland. We were pleasantly surprised to find out that with our room, my dad had given us access to the lounge.

This place had it all. And with that amazingly delicious hot coffee, we also enjoyed an endless buffet of croissants, eggs, potatoes, bacon, fruit, cereal… you name it, they have it. And exploiting the limitless options became a regular routine to start each day, followed by a couple hours with some combination of sitting by the pool, working out (in a real gym!) and/or taking the executive workout as I like to call them – a rotation between the sauna, steam room and hot tub. (EDITOR’S NOTE: Oh Bangkok JW Marriott, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways…)

Over the course of the next five nights we would stay here together, the three of us lived it up, out every night painting the town red didn’t leave the hotel. You may read that and think we were lazy, or didn’t take advantage of being in such a great international city like Bangkok. To you I say without shame, whatever. Nine months of bouncing around between some questionable accommodations (three nights prior to Bangkok we slept on a mattress on the floor of a $3/night room, followed by the previously mentioned overnight bus, for example) makes you want to really soak up and appreciate a few nights on a comfortable mattress with plenty of other creature comforts such as a modern toilet, consistently hot shower and many other things we took for granted at home.

That, plus spending time just hanging and catching up with my dad was higher on the to-do list than touring the sites around town (it helped that my dad took the same work trip a year ago and already saw the sites himself, so no guilt necessary for suggesting we stay on-campus for most of our nights).

Noelle and I did, however, venture out one night to sample some street food that we’d read about in Chinatown. And even then, we were back at the hotel before 10pm, which at this point isn’t too surprising since most of our nightlife capabilities didn’t fit into our backpacks when we left Chicago.

But one night was all it was. Otherwise we were back in our urban oasis spending time with the MontyDad and his co-workers, catching up poolside and/or over cold drinks and deliciously western food that we had been without for so long. (EDITOR’S NOTE: One night, we went to the lobby’s Bangkok version of Benihana. So I ate for about 3 hours non-stop. Because BENIHANA.) Everything we hoped it would be and more.

All of this happened during the peak of the Shutdown Bangkok protests over the elections. While it got a lot of play in international media for being violent, the protesters we saw were consistently peaceful.

Two weeks later we were back (Monty-less) in the capital for one last night before we’d say farewell to Thailand and Asia altogether. Sadly but understandably that last time around we were without the JW Marriott amenities (we did, however, consider many ways of sneaking our way into the lounge for one last run at the cheese board and self-service bar, but to no avail), although we did find an affordable place to stay just down the street.

After a slow day regaining our energy from our – at this point – 10^th overnight bus in the previous three and a half months we gave Bangkok one more go ‘round by checking out the Soi 38 Night Market and dabbling in some final good Thai eats before our 4am wakeup to get to the airport the next morning.

While the city itself won’t be our fondest memory of the region, the five days with my dad won’t soon be forgotten. After saying our farewells on that second Bangkok visit, we were headed south for even more R&R – this time on the beaches of Koh Lanta.

Over the River and Through the Woods, to Mae Salong We Go

by Noelle

January 19 – 21

 

“Lonely Planet is a dying breed…they’ve been replaced. It’s now a big bathroom wall (social media/blogs). Anybody can write on it.” – Anthony Bourdain, Medium Raw

Now, while I generally agree with our traveling and food guru (having, in fact, methodically plowed my way through his books during our travels), I have to argue that every once in a while, that big ol’ book spotted in every other hand on a busy foreign street can lead you to a diamond in the rough. By flipping through those pages you can find the spots that bloggers DON’T frequent (and then, of course, can do a targeted Google search to find the posts from those who have), and that’s exactly what happened with our next destination.

It was in the well-weathered pages of our Lonely Planet Thailand book that we found a small mention of Mae Salong – a tiny, cozy mountain town in northeast Thailand that consists of one unnamed road and tea fields as far as the eye can see. To quote the LP persuasions to make the trip, “it’s hilltop setting, Chinese residents, and abundance of hill tribes and tea plantations converge in a unique destination not unlike a small town in southern China’s Yunnan Province.” Something about the simple paragraphs struck me and although between the two of us, Dave tends to have more passion for our destinations, it was a rare moment when I pointed to a place in a book and we went. But point and go we did.

But, not before a run for the border. And not one that started with a choice between Mild and Hot sauce and ended with cinnamon dust on your fingers.

This one was an age-old tradition of the Thai visa border run. Needing to re-up our visas, but not wanting to pay the hefty fee for extensions or the full 60-day visa (30 day visas are now issued for Americans free upon entry at the border but with our total stay netting at 38 days, you can see our dilemma), we departed our beloved Chiang Mai and set off to hopscotch the nearest border – Burma (also known as Myanmar) – for what turned out to be our shortest turn in a country: 10 minutes. And voila – $19 later and we were renewed for another 30 days! (The 19 may sound arbitrary, but the Burmese are very particular about their currencies and will not accept bills with even minute tears or marks. As you can imagine, they’ve seen their share of money depreciation over time, so we respect the attention to detail. They didn’t want our near-pristine $20 and instead took 3 fives and 4 ones that we also were carrying).

Well, shoot. Now I can’t stop thinking about tacos.

MMMMMMM tacos.

Where the heck was I? Oh right, back to Mae Salong. Heading south after our whirlwind Burmese tour (And spare me the unsolicited sermon. I know, I know, you haven’t LIVED unless you’ve spent time in Burma/Myanmar…”It’s like Thailand 15 years ago…go before it becomes mainstream, man.” We hear you. But as a 30 something traveler, the 15-years-ago Thailand economy is not exactly a sales tactic that will work on me. You have your itinerary, we have ours.), we started our strange journey to Mae Salong. This one included being dropped by a minibus at an intersection where we’d been told that usually, a blue songthaew (think pick up truck with tricked out covered back for passengers) would be parked between its infrequent hour-long runs uphill to the sleepy tea town. With little faith that there would even be rumored hoopty at said intersection (THERE WAS!) and convinced we’d have to overpay to get to our final destination (WE DID!), we were relieved to finally arrive in Mae Salong at sunset, settling into the cheapest room on our trip to date (EDITOR’S NOTE: Three dollars! Count ‘em: THREE! So for half the price of a Chipotle burrito bowl – I haven’t forgotten you, Chipotle – we had a place to lay our heads. So what if it was cold and windy outside and the window didn’t fully shut or seal…) for a quick sleep before we walked the remaining distance the next morning to our promised respite of Mae Salong Mountain Home.

It was glorious. With views on all sides of the painstakingly precise rows of tea plants perched on the hillsides, we settled in for a peaceful two days in the crisp climate.

Not long ago, before Mae Salong got into the tea business, it was famous for its opium trade.  The town was originally settled by the Chinese Nationalist soldiers in the 1950’s when they were forced to flee to Burma from China (mainly from Yunnan, one of the most southern provinces of China) – subsequently spilling over the borders into Thailand for more available land. These soldiers funded their arms purchases by rubbing shoulders with the local drug lords.

It wasn’t until the 70s that the Thai government finally “persuaded” the hill tribes to make the shift from opium to tea production (the rough mountainous terrain and unpaved roads gave the Yunnanese an ability to ignore the attempts from the Thai authorities to suppress the illegal activities for a while). The Chinese influence still lingers, as seen in the local dialect and food, including some Yunnanese sausage and noodle dishes (good) and Yunnan kimchi pork (not so good).

So, we thank you, Lonely Planet, for pointing us toward Mae Salong. We promise to let you sit at our lunch table at school when the other kids are mean to you.

Pai: Thailand’s Never Never Land

by Noelle

January 15 – 18

 

After spending a bit of time in Chiang Mai, we were ready for one of our increasingly-frequent getaways into the great outdoors. We hopped on a motorbike and started the 3-hour winding ride into the mountains, with plans to spend 2 nights in the much talked about town of Pai.

What they DON’T talk about is how once you venture up a few hundred feet and into the thick shade of the trees, it’s freezing cold. And since we’d left our bags in Chiang Mai to lighten the load for our short stay in Pai, we had limited clothing. So we rocked layers. Lots of layers.

Oh, and the 125cc motorbike we rented? NOT, in fact, equipped to climb mountains.

But the twisted, frigid journey was well worth the frostbite as we cruised through the lush hillside.

 

As was the destination. Once a quiet market village, Pai now thrives on tourism, with people of every age making the wanderer’s pilgrimage there with the promise of no responsibilities. 762 curves later (literally), we pulled up alongside the daily market and coasted down the center of town.

And right into Peter Pan’s freaking Never Never Land.

With nothing but open-air bars playing live music, funky coffee shops offering local teas and coffees and the promise of lazy waterfalls and sexy hot springs nearby, Lost Boys and Girls from around the globe flock to this alternative-lifestyle-friendly, shoes-optional mecca with nothing but time (and likely something a little stronger than Tinkerbell’s fairy dust) in their pockets.

Our time was filled with hours reading or dozing on haphazardly-strung hammocks, star-gazing from our porch overlooking the mountains, and strolling the streets of the night market, trying to fit in by rocking genie pants and pulling on my socks and flip flops (I really got into the role…at one point I believe I said to Dave, “If things had been different, I could have totally been a hippie.”).  All that, and of course, thinking happy thoughts.

And ever a sucker for a good sunset, we spent an afternoon on the crest of Pai Canyon, watching the sun turn the sky vivid hues of blue, yellow and red and wishing we never had to grow up.

The town is charmingly full of whimsy, displayed in the eccentric hairstyle choices, fanciful shops and bars and the love-themed signage. Pai loves everyone. And everything. Needless to say, two nights turned to three pretty quickly and only the fact that the bike had to be returned eventually brought us back down the mountain.

In the end, we were glad to have chased our shadows to the land frozen in time, and were reluctant to sew them on for good. With only three months left in our year-long travels, we were starting to realize the impending realities and brainstorm frequently how to delay the inevitable.

Our solution?

Just grab the 107 to the 1021 and straight on til morning.

“It is not in doing what you like, but in liking what you do that is the secret of happiness.” – J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

Chiang Mai: A Lot to Digest

by Dave

January 11 – 14

 

More than we ever could have anticipated, our travels have been guided and gauged by food. We’re far from foodies, and we (or at least I) can’t describe foods in great detail beyond caveman descriptions like “good” or “want more” or, you know, just happy, incoherent grunts. I actually get physically uncomfortable when I try to act like I can describe the individual ingredients that I can pick up in each bite, let alone trying to discuss the “diverse flavor profile” of a food.

Our itinerary has been influenced by varying levels of research, recommendations from friends, other blogs and random findings on the Google. But at the end of the day, when the belly speaks, the body listens.

And after our forgettable feasting in Koh Samet, the belly wanted more. So naturally, we listened and made haste (the sweaty walk>ferry>minivan>train>sweaty walk>bus>overnight bus>taxi>more sweaty walking kind of haste) to Chiang Mai.

Maybe it’s my terrible memory. Or maybe I just wasn’t paying close enough attention 5+ years ago. Either way, upon arrival in Chiang Mai my visual memories of my last visit failed me horribly (which opens up a whole other bag of issues to add to my old man tendencies that Noelle chides me about) (EDITOR’S NOTE: And paired with my terrible short-term memory, our 60+-year-old selves are totally screwed). What I remember from the last time around was the motorbiking outside the city and exploring the wats around town. While there was plenty of opportunity to do both this time around as well, we opted for zig-zagging around the streets of this deceptively large and friendly city on foot.

Don’t mistake our food-friendly dispositions for a lack of ambition for other activities. For example, the one time I found fried mashed potato balls at the market? Those were sold right in front of Wat Phan Tao.

Or when we got one of our many fruit smoothies? We had to walk through the Wat Phra Singh with the reclining Buddha to find the smoothie stand across the street.

And on one our many food-finding excursions we walked the entire perimeter of Old City. So yeah, we like totally saw the sites around town.

To be fair, we did already know we had a motorbike ride ahead of us for a multi-day trip further north from Chiang Mai. So we were more than ok that the majority of our activities revolved around indulging and sampling the local offerings. Easy to please, and quick to act on impulse, Chiang Mai caters to people like us.

Truth be told, there’s a heck of a lot more to explore and visit in Chiang Mai than its cuisine. But if you skip the local grub, you’re missing out on the tail that wags the dog. (EDITOR’S NOTE: To supplement our ever-dwindling travel budget, we’re simultaneously currently working on an at-home study guide of really awesome metaphors.)

Take the markets, for instance. We arrived on a Saturday, which worked out in our favor by allowing us to experience the full gambit of market-going that Chiang Mai has to offer.

We did the Saturday Market Walking Street, the Sunday Market Walking Street (by far the largest and most comprehensive of markets – definitely try to include this weekend evening in your stay), the nightly South Gate Market, the Warorot Market and another morning fresh food market near the edge of the Old City. The vendors there are either selling food, local souvenirs or clothes, all with smiles on their faces while greeting us with a friendly “Sawadee ka/krap” (hello in Thai), to which we’d typically reply by mumbling something that we hoped sounded correct, but more likely came out sounding like “Zippady-do-da!”

The food vendors were the ones we made acquaintances with most frequently. Rice sausage with green chilis? Dontmindifido.

Mango sticky rice? Hit me.

Fruit shakes? Want.

Curries, fried noodles, pork and veggie skewers, ancient ice cream pop and an official-name-not-known coconut dessert treat? One of each, please.

But all of these pale in comparison to the almighty Khao Soi, a Chiang Mai (and northern Thailand, for that matter) specialty available just about everywhere.

Ingredients include an intoxicating dark broth, a fall-off-the-bone chicken drumstick, fried Chinese egg noodles, diced onions and green veggies all topped off with crispy yellow noodles and what I can only describe as a dash of love. Sprinkle on some crushed red pepper flakes, a sprinkling of fish sauce and a squeeze of a lime and prepare for culinary bliss.

Sure, there are plenty of other things you can do here. Chiang Mai is a popular stop for most out-of-towners’ Thailand itineraries for a reason. Bellies full, we were ready to explore more of the region without using food as our guide. So we got ourselves a motorbike and set off for, as irony would have it, a city with a name that sounds like more food: Pai.

(Thai)sland Introduction

by Dave

January 6 – 10

 

Hello, Thailand. It’s nice to see you again. A little over five years ago I spent a few weeks in Thailand and loved everything about it, so I was excited to get back and enjoy a second tour with m’lady. A few of our stops will be in places I have already been to, but our first one was new to both us. We figured we’d start our Thai adventure in style at one of the islands for which the country is famous, and after a “who’s who” of Thai island review, we honed in on Koh Samet. Because of Samet’s close proximity to Bangkok, the island idyll a popular weekend getaway for Bangkokians Bangkocians Bangkokites people from Bangkok. And by dumb luck, we timed our visit so that it started on a Monday, so less crowds. Point, Dave and Noelle. (EDITOR’S NOTE: But maybe we call it a draw after the ill-spent evening on Khao San Road before catching our connecting transportation to our island getaway, where I became acutely aware that I am absolutely not cool enough for Bangkok’s popular backpacker district…nor do I own shorts short enough…but more on that when we return to the capital in a few weeks. Definitely, definitely, no points earned.).

Surprisingly underdeveloped, there are few cars navigating the single dirt road that crawls across the island. Beach-hopping from cove to sandy cove that line the Eastern coast is done by foot, and views of the jungle interior are always just a glance away. One reason for the minimal development on most of the island may be due to its designation as a national park, which also means all visitors are charged a 200 baht fee upon entry (setting you back a modest $6).

We found a cheap room on Ao Phai beach, we ate mediocre food that was more expensive than it should have been while overlooking the clear, blue Gulf of Thailand waters and we spent plenty of time on the beach.

I wish I had more to share, but when you spend four nights somewhere and eat most of your meals in the same place and sit the beach all day, there’s not much to talk about. Soooo, yeah.

Stroking the embers of December

by Dave and Noelle

 

Time for your monthly installation of Bauer self-indulgence. December saw us through one of our favorite countries yet – Vietnam – and we’ll do anything to keep the flame of last month alive. Below are our favorite moments from the 31 days of a month typically spent bundled up and fighting off colds back in Chicago. This time, much of it revolved around eating. We made memories doing other stuff too. A few.

Check it out…

 

She Says:

10. On our last morning in Hoi An, Dave and I saddled up on the guesthouse’s bikes and pedaled out to An Bang beach. After reaching our sandy destination, we happened upon a rousing rendition of “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” from some Vietnamese children. Realizing that holiday traditions weren’t limited to just the familiar helped me miss home a little less.

9. Our comfy bed in Dalat (IT EVEN SPORTED A RARELY-SEEN-IN-THE-ASIAN-WILD COMFORTER! IT WAS FLUFFY!) was bliss. I think it’s a misconception that when you travel long-term, every day is filled with sightseeing or adventure. You need to decompress, just like at home. So our day spent in that heavenly bed with a cheap Dalat red and a Netflix lineup of Scandal: Season 1, was easily Top 10 material.

8. After a delicious dinner taken on our cozy junk boat in Halong Bay, Dave and I settled into a couple seats overlooking the peaceful bay – the sky littered with stars – with good books and a bootleg bottle of wine (that Dave had negotiated from the row boat vendor – I love this man).

7. In our search for an elusive street vendor in Dalat, we thought we finally scored big as we squatted on a couple plastic chairs in the back room of a hole-in-the-wall (like – literally – there was a hole in the wall and we walked into it.). We quickly realized they didn’t even sell food, but the back room was packed with locals with Hanoi beers in hand and empties covering aluminum table tops (mind you, at 11 am) staring at us with naked interest. Sooooo naturally….when in Rome Vietnam…

6. One of my most memorable dining experiences (of life) will remain our ridiculous meal at Ba Le Well. Moments after sitting down with our fellow traveling friends, Pat & Brenda, we were greeted with hot plates of BBQ pork skewers, crispy folds of oily bahn xeo, drippingly-delicious fried spring rolls, slivers of bright red peppers and roughly ripped cilantro…all without placing an order. Dave’s face was stuffed forcibly by our aggressive host as the rest of us wrapped it all in rice paper and ate ourselves into oblivion.

5. Although we were missing home at Christmas, our tasty meal at the Rusty Keyhole in Kampot, Cambodia eased our wistful longings. The crowded plate of New Zealand lamb, succulent pork, mashed potatoes and steamed veggies gave us the rice-and-noodles-less meal we needed. Plus, sharing a glass of wine or two trading travel stories with the NZ couple at the table next to us gave us the distraction to match.

4. The first moment of hitting the beach in Phu Quoc was my spirit animal. I am a sucker for sand and sun, and after a month-long stretch of pavement, loud noises and enough vendor hawking to last a lifetime, this lazy respite provided the ideal setting for peaceful recharging.

3. Vietnamese street food. Yes, it made last month’s November top 10 list. You’d do it too. A highlight would be the “pizza” street vendor in Dalat. She was everything I want in a street vendor. Quick, efficient, smiley, and ADAMANT that you enjoy what mama’s cookin’.

2. After baking ourselves appropriately during the first afternoon on Phu Quoc, we took in a mind-blowing sunset, showcasing God’s full color palate before making our way to the night market where Dave negotiated a still-swimming barracuda for our night’s meal. I shouldn’t have to explain why these things are awesome.

1. Celebrating Christmas with a motorbike trip to the Kep crab market. Eating fresh crab (literally pulled fresh from the sea and thrown directly into the pot for us) seaside while wearing Santa hats was a memorable way to spend our holiday away from home. Who needs Santa when you have this guy?

 

He Says:

10. Our victory lap in Hanoi. This is kind of like cheating to put this on this list since we pretty much left the city in November, but upon returning to Hanoi after our cruise in Halong Bay in early December, we quickly pushed our previously booked overnight bus back a day to allow ourselves one last day to roam the streets of the Old Quarter and enjoy the amazing street food the city has to offer. Five days in November just wasn’t enough.

9. Being able to Skype and call our families on and around Christmas made the holidays more than bearable for us on the road. Grandparents, parents, siblings… you name it, we talked to them. I’m still a little amazed at how easy it has been to stay in touch with our loved ones while we’re thousands of miles away for so long.

8. Our date night in Phnom Penh, planned by Noelle. One of the benefits of SE Asian travel is the cheap cost of just about everything. But every now and again, it’s nice to be able to say something like “Hell yes, I’ll have a martini, some calamari and some oysters.”

7. Walking around Hoi An’s Old Quarter. This area of Hoi An isn’t open to any motorized vehicles, which was a welcome change after the insane traffic and crowded streets of Hanoi we had just left. Combine that with the lanterns lighting the streets at night and the many bars, shops and restaurants lining the streets and you have a quaint little city that definitely warrants the hype.

6. Our dinner with Pat and Brenda at Ba Le Well in Hoi An.  We had all read about this place and its great reviews, but had no clue what we were in for. Once we finally tracked it down, we were seated at a table immediately. No more than 30 seconds after sitting down we were bombarded with plates of skewered pork, vegetables, rice paper, sauces and spring rolls. There is no ordering food here, only eating. You can read more about it in Noelle’s post, but it was easily one of our best and likely the most entertaining meal we had all month.

5. Recharging the batteries in Dalat. At six days, this was our longest stay in one location in December, and on the surface it seems like an odd choice for an extended stay but we were in need of some down time after… well, maybe saying we “needed” down time is a stretch, but it was nice to make time to Skype with a lot of friends and family, watch some shows and movies on Netflix and even find some time to work out for the first time in a long time while we were here. Our amazing bed and comforter at Dreams Hotel also made it hard to justify leaving. And because it’s Vietnam, the food also did not suck.

4. Our three days in Phu Quoc nicely wrapped the bow on our time in Vietnam. We would have loved Phu Quoc no matter when we went, but sometimes timing can be everything and getting to this sleepy island for lazy days on the beach and scrumptious seafood at the night market right after the madness that is Ho Chi Minh City made it all the better.

3. Christmas in Kampot and Kep. As far non-traditional holiday celebrations go, this was a good one. We would have loved to have spent the holidays with our families, but Skype calls and video chats had to suffice when we had down time between motorbiking between these two small coastal towns with Santa hats in tow. It also helped that we ate the best steamed crab I’ve ever had in my life.

2. Our Halong Bay cruise stands out for multiple reasons, but more than anything it was great to get out on the water for the first time really since Greece back in September. We had great luck with the sunny skies and calm waters. The only downside was that we were only able to sleep on the boat for two nights. If we had our way and weren’t working on a budget, two nights could have quickly turned into two weeks.

1. Vietnamese food takes the cake for me in December. As we’ve highlighted in pretty much every single post this month, our opinion of each city we visited has largely been dependent on our meals and snacks. Whether it was the pho or bun cha in Hanoi, the cau lau in Hoi An, the banh trang nuong, sugar bomb sandwiches  and baos in Dalat, the pho again in Ho Chi Minh City or anything else we tried, it will be hard to top Vietnamese food the rest of the trip.

Wats Up, 2014?

by Noelle

December 30 – January 2

 

Kompong Cham

Chances are, if you’re in a Southeast Asian city you’re not in love with, you can take a short ride out of town to another one that will earn a coveted spot on your crush list. So, not ready for the noisy, overpriced New Year’s Eve celebrations that Phnom Penh promised, we hoisted our ever-growing packs (but I needed that Vietnamese noodle mummy sweatshirt!) on our backs and boarded a short bus ride to Kompong Cham. Never heard of it? Turns out, it’s for good reason (the bus ticket saleslady’s “oh, are you going there for work?” should have tipped us off).

So, let me start again.

Chances are, if you’re in a Southeast Asian city you’re not in love with, you can take a short ride out of town to another SE Asian city that is waiting to crush your adventurer’s spirit.

Sigh.

It was with good intent that we headed to the little-known riverside town to ring in the New Year. We wanted quiet. We wanted to walk among Cambodian people without tripping over other westerners. We wanted quaint and atmospheric. We got the first two in spades. The third – not so much. It seems that this once-bustling trading port (back when the French had their way in the late 1800s to mid 1900s) has been left in the dust to big sisters Battambang and Siem Reap. Quite literally. It’s dusty. While it remains a travel hub for local travel (thanks to the first and only bridge spanning the Mekong’s width in Cambodia), it’s largely a place where people just pass on through.

Not that this town spread along the banks of the Mekong River was without merit. We ate tentatively (after our recent bout with food poisoning in the country’s capitol a couple days prior), but tastily, with flavorful lok lak and curries and caught the most entertaining display of sidewalk aerobics to have ever been.

What are my credentials for judging the lazy, synchronized movements of these middle-aged ladies? My mom was an 80’s jazzercise instructor. No further resume entries needed. Consider me hired (and still able to flawlessly execute the routines to Paula Abdul’s “Cold Hearted Snake” in my sleep). 

But when it came to New Year’s Eve celebrations, the city was a snooze. We were off the sauce (reasons stated above), but we thought there’d be some sort of expat celebrations. But then we realized – THERE ARE NO EXPATS. So, “authentic?” We got. And were in bed by 11 pm. CONTAIN YOUR JEALOUSY.

However, the few lazy days of strolling the river walk, exploring the quiet streets as locals went about their business of….whatever it is this town’s business is….were rightly timed before we re-entered the world of obscene tourism as we set out for the main attraction of travelers to this compact Buddhist country – Angkor Wat.

Siem Reap/Angkor Wat

Our ride from the southeast corner of this dusty Khmer country showcased the underdeveloped countryside, with its stilted houses (to prevent flood damage during wet season) and array of plants and vegetation. Gone were the rolling green hills of Vietnam, replaced by the low-lying central plains that characterize Cambodia.

Siem Reap’s economy has boomed since the Civil War ended in the late ‘80s and travelers were emboldened to travel to this war-torn country (more on its history in Dave’s last post here). Home to the UNESCO World Heritage Site of the famed Angkor Wat and other ancient temples, Siem Reap is a big contributor to the #2 source of income for the country (tourism is second only to textiles).

And we couldn’t be more glad it’s now in heavy SE Asian rotation. We loved it. The gaudily lit Pub Street filled with Cambodian and Western restaurants alike (the dollar is accepted – and even preferred – everywhere over the Cambodian riel), and countless places to sip cold Angkor beers and watch the camera-carrying cattle herd by. Touristy it may be, but something about the city makes this okay. Maybe because of its balance with the history-rich Angkor temples? Or that you can still get lost in the Old Market among the local women lazily selling the day’s specials? Or that you can still pull up a chair to a communal table where frog is on the menu? (EDITOR’S NOTE: Or that you can eat sushi, Mexican, Indian and Italian food in less than three days after a steady diet of Cambodian and Vietnamese for the past month? Perhaps that? Definitely that. We liked that.) Whatever it is, it worked for us.

After our amphibious lunch and wanderings, we indulged in the Cambodian tradition of a fish massage. Giving hundreds of fish an Old Country Buffet-style meal on your feet’s dead skin. It was gross.

It tickled like crazy.

It was amazing.

It was well worth the $3 (for both of us, including a beer…there is no excuse NOT to do this).

And then? BUBBLES! Seriously…it’s harder to find a glass of prosecco on a SE Asian menu than it was to spot the King of the Jungle during our time in Africa. Come to think of it, THIS is maybe what made the tourist traffic doable? Hmmmmm.

After spending our first full day strolling the Old Market and letting fish have their way with our extremities, we were ready to take on the temples. Up before sunrise the next morning, we biked the silent, dark streets, making our way to the mother of them all – Angkor Wat – in hopes to catch a dazzling sunrise over the infamous temple.

The hush that settled around the pond hugging the “Temple City” was palpable (an incredible feat for the hundreds of tourists gathered in one spot), and the mass anticipation for the sun to peak above the sandstone spires was tangible. It’s nearly impossible for me to ever agree something is worth rising in the 4 o’clock hour for – and this doesn’t break that steadfast belief. That said, there is something special about being before a centuries-old temple as the sun meets the day. But you could also get everything you need at like, 1 pm. We actually came back in the afternoon for a few key photos when the light was better (because you know, we’re like TOTALLY photographers now. That’s something photographers would say, right?).

After climbing around the moat-protected temple for an hour or so (seriously, they let you climb all over these things…I can only imagine that someone somewhere will have something to say about this sometime very soon. Where you at UNESCO??), we headed onto the next temple in our short line-up. We only had three “must-sees” of the day – short by any temple-goers standards, but others may not have been in their 3^rd month of Asian wat overdosage…so BACK OFF. But first, some pics of the main attraction:

Next up? TOMB RAIDER TEMPLE. You know it, you love it, you dream of Angelina Jolie because of it. To sum up, Ta Prohm was really, really cool. The trees are literally growing through the corridors and roofs of the temple as if the jungle had melted right into the infrastructure (basically it was abandoned and forgotten not long after the fall of the Khmer Empire in the 17^th century). The destruction this is doing to the late 12^th century old-as-dirt temple is evident everywhere, and the buzz overheard from the dozen tour guides we crossed paths with (we’re not above eavesdropping) was that there is a plan for removing some of the massive silk-cotton tree trunks to preserve what is left of the leaf-canopied temple.

Our final temple found us in a perpetual losing staring contest. Bayon temple, built in the early 12^th/late 13^th century, was relatively boring until making the climb to the upper terrace where over 216 faces (we stood no chance) are etched into the stone walls. While many of the faces have lost one or more of their parts, it was an incredible sight to behold.

Our wonderment through all of our temple exploration was consistent – imagining the ancient Cambodian people building the massive temples with nothing more than elephants, ropes, pulleys and what their mamas gave them is beyond impressive. Biking back to the city found us contemplative (and hungry, because always), and we will forever remain humbled by the day’s experience.

To give our wat-weary feet a rest after our long day of biking and exploring the nooks and crannies of yore, we plopped down for the cheapest foot massage this side of the Mississippi Mekong. I love this place. RUB MY FEET, YOU BEAUTIFUL CAMBODIAN GODDESS AND I WILL GIVE YOU ALL THE WORLDLY THINGS YOU DESIRE! Or at least the 3 dollars you’re charging.

We truly adored Siem Reap, and were pleased to leave the city on a high note as we made haste from the SE Asian country that earned the least amount of time on our itinerary. After two short weeks, we were skipping town and heading to Thailand – our last stop in Asia – where the beaches of the south and lush rolling tea paddies of the north waited patiently for our arrival.

Intro to Cambodia: From Coast to Capital

by Dave

December 24 – 29

 

Despite our desire to stay even longer, I guess we had to leave Vietnam at some point (EDITOR’S NOTE: We log endless miles on your streets and alleys. We meet your families. We eat Pho at your tables (like all of them). And THIS is the thanks we get? I thought we were forever, Vietnam.). We reluctantly said goodbye after using up our visas to the final day of validity, and it was time to move on… to Cambodia. We went in with as open a plan for the coming weeks as we have had at any point of our trip. But we did know that we would start in Kampot, a small city on the southern coast of Cambodia that was conveniently just about an hour and a half from the border crossing with Vietnam, and spend at least a couple days exploring the charming city and its seaside neighbor, Kep.

Kampot & Kep

Prior to the horrendously oppressive and destructive rule of the Khmer Rouge in the 1970’s (more on that later), Kampot and Kep were beautiful getaways for the Cambodian elite. With remnants of the gorgeous French Colonial architecture all around, and the warm waters of the Gulf of Thailand lapping against its shores, you can understand why. Today, these two small cities are in search of a way to restore their past prominence, but to characterize them as struggling and not worth a visit would be false.

One thing we’ve discovered about ourselves is that while we love us some big cities (see Barcelona, Istanbul, Hanoi and others), we equally desire sleepy towns to decompress in. Kampot and Kep would both fall into the latter group (EDITOR’S NOTE: Like WAY fall into. Like started the “sleepy town” clique in high school.). In places like these, you’re afforded the luxury of not having to plan anything in advance and still finding it easy to see just about everything and do whatever your heart (and/or wallet) (EDITOR’S NOTE: and/or stomach…) desires. Even on Christmas. So upon checking into our room at Kampot’s Magic Sponge Guesthouse (a spot we’d highly recommend to any future visitors) on Christmas Eve, we set out on the town to explore. And about 30 minutes later, we’d seen it. Almost all of it. Or, at least enough to realize we made the right decision to start our time in Cambodia here.

Noelle alluded to this in her Saigon post, but we didn’t have as hard a time missing Christmas as we thought we would. Don’t mistake that for a lack of holiday spirit on our part though – we still found time to watch Polar Express on Netflix on Christmas eve, hang a handmade quilted ornament we received from Grandma Overly on a palm tree and even hear a surprise, rousing rendition of The Night Before Christmas from one Lynnette Overly via Skype (control your jealousy) (EDITOR’S NOTE: Or don’t. Either way you can’t have her – she’s MINE ALL MINE. MWAHAHAHAHH!). Ah, technology and the simple things, amiright or amiright?

Our loneliness and any hint of Christmas-away-from-home blues were avoided thanks to the fact that we had filled our Christmas day with some activities to take our mind off the fact that we were so far from friends and family.

We were determined to make the holiday memorable, so after our afternoon of exploring Kampot on foot and finding a quiet place to enjoy some Khmer Curry and Lok Lak (both Cambodian staples) for Christmas Eve dinner, we nodded off with visions of sugar plums crabs dancing in our heads. Yup, crabs.

The next morning we donned our Santa hats (best $2 purchase of Vietnam) and hit the open road for a motorbike ride to Kep’s famed Crab Market. Kep is even smaller than Kampot, and the market is the main show in town. Being right on the water, it makes sense that the seafood is amazing. Combine the notorious crab with the equally notorious Kampot pepper, and we had one of our best lunches of recent memory.

Just as the gas gauge was teetering below the empty line, we pulled back into Kampot in time for our Christmas feast. For that, we picked the Rusty Keyhole, a place that looks exactly like what you think it would, that was serving a set menu Christmas dinner that included lamb, pork, mashed potatoes and a few other hearty eats we hadn’t tasted in months. It was glorious.

And to make things even better, we stumbled into a conversation with a couple from NZ that is similarly in the midst of a year-long career break to travel. This, after delicately leaving one where two drunk ex-pats insisted we were Jennifer Aniston and Patrick Rafter, harassing us until we signed napkins as such. NZ for the win!

 

Phnom Penh

It was short and sweet, but Kampot and Kep provided a great intro to Cambodia. But before our two days turned into two weeks (apparently that’s a common problem for Kampot visitors who get sucked in by the sleepy vibe), it was time to move on yet again. This time to Cambodia’s capitol – Phnom Penh.

It was quite a contrast from our first stop – where Kampot and Kep are quiet and relaxing, Phnom Penh is loud, loaded with traffic and stressful to navigate as we unavoidably discovered as we first got off our bus.

Thankfully we found a cheap and “good enough” room before easing into things our first night. Our collective indecision was peaking as neither of us could commit to any specific place for dinner when dinner finally found us instead. A papaya salad stand on wheels, to be more specific. We have still yet to find one as good as this first time.

It’d be a stretch to consider Phnom Penh a walking city. Yes, you can walk around it (as we did). But it’s a pretty effing long way to walk from one end to the other. We found this out when we decided to tackle the Central Market and Russian Market on the same day. Both markets are pretty large, having to house numerous stalls offering butchered meats, prepared foods and drinks, clothes, shoes and other goods.

They can be a bit intimidating for some, but by this point we had been through numerous markets throughout Laos and Vietnam so we weren’t too fazed. A new tactic was used here that we hadn’t seen as much in previous stops though. Instead of just a standard “hello” or “you want buy something?”, Cambodian vendors opted to save their breath and combine the two which resulted in Noelle’s Cambodian alter ego – Lady Buysomething. Everywhere we’d walk by, we’d hear pleas of “Lady Buysomething.” It was amazing. Annoying at first, but amazing and entertaining in the end.

And following the standard expat tradition, we joined the leagues of happy hour seekers at some of the more notable scenic establishments for cold, refreshing beverages.

In between some longgggg walks weaving our way around the city between the shores of the mighty Mekong River and the major markets, we came to like Phnom Penh. Trouble is, we’re not so sure it was equally fond of us after our long run of street food good luck ran out during a trip to the night market for dinner.

Dabbling in another papaya salad and some sort of noodle dish (in hind sight, the mystery meat and sauces probably should have been a red flag), Lady Buysomething and I both woke up the next day feeling, shall we say, “under the weather.”

But, after a quiet day that included our leaving the room just two times to grab small snacks (in addition to the hidden benefit of our sub-par health: cranking through many episodes of Breaking Bad), we were feeling up for some activity the next day.

So on our last day we headed into the city for a necessary stop at the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum, also known by its previous name, S-21 Prison. The museum provided an accurate (and rightfully graphic at times) depiction of the horrors that Cambodians endured less than 40 years ago.

I have to admit that I had never really heard of the Khmer Rouge’s destructive Nazi-like rule from April 1975 to January 1979 prior to our planning and research for this trip. But it warrants much more education than it’s garnered abroad for the incomprehensible genocide committed against innocent Cambodians.

The regime won a civil war in the 1970s and promptly cleared out the capital city to “cleanse” the nation of what they viewed as threats – or what any other sane person would view as educated people. Over the course of four horrific years, an estimated 1.7 million people (more than 20% of the Cambodian population at the time) were arrested, tortured, murdered or met their end through disease or starvation during the Khmer Rouge rule. And Security Office 21 (as it was referred to during those years) was the center of this real-life nightmare. According to the museum, the prison was set up for “detention, interrogation, inhuman torture, and killing after confession.” Of those that didn’t find their end in the prison, many were taken 11km outside the city to the Choeung Ek killing fields where they were murdered and dumped into mass graves.

If ever I’ve had a more sobering experience than walking through this real life hell, I’d be hard pressed to recall it. There are gallows still intact on display, small holding cells, and rooms displaying the headshots of victims (many of them women and children) as well as one room with the skulls of many victims on display behind a thin, Plexiglas windows.

It was a depressing and sobering experience to go through just before leaving, but one we’d highly recommend to anyone going to Phnom Penh so you can start to understand what Cambodians have all gone through in some way, shape or form in the not-so-distant past.

After recounting the event’s of Cambodia’s past, it was time to move on in the present as we were off to explore Siem Reap, the Angkor temples and more of this historically rich country.

A Proper Vietnamese Send-Off, Served Sandy-Side Up

by Noelle

December 21 – 24

 

Our great escape from the bustling noise of Ho Chi Minh City came in the form of an (thankfully uneventful) overnight bus and ridiculously choppy ferry ride (the plastic baggies they passed out to every passenger soon identified their purpose) (EDITOR’S NOTE: Never in my life have I seen and – more repulsively – heard so. many… well, you know what I mean. It’s a ride that I would love to, but likely will never be able to forget.) and was rewarded with a few lazy, insanely beautiful days on the beautiful island of Phu Quoc.

The largest island in Vietnam, this sandy oasis is located off the southwestern coast of the country, and just 12k from the Cambodian coast, it also made convenient our imminent move to our next SE Asian country. In fact, the island suffers an identity crisis due to both Vietnam and Cambodia staking a historical claim to it and the surrounding waters (some Cambodians still consider it their territory – and geographically, we see their point).  Nonetheless, border control (our main audience of concern at the time) considered it our final stop in Vietnam and we arrived in the island town of Duong Dong midday, ready to get our tan on.

With the past few months of Asian travels finally catching up with us, we made these last-minute plans to finish our time in our beloved Vietnam by stretching our pho-stuffed, vendor-weary, tired bodies on the warm sand for a full 72 hours before Vietnam made us leave (our visas expired on Christmas Eve or you’d still find me beachside eating fresh pineapple and mangoes by the pound while the warm waters of the Gulf of Thailand lapped at my feet. I mean – IT’S CHRISTMAS PEOPLE – WHERE’S YOUR HOLIDAY SPIRIT??).

I don’t have a whole lot else to say about our time on this piece of paradise, so I’ll keep it short.

During the day, we did a lot of this:

Then at dusk approached, we settled in to watch these (you too should settle in):

Then after the sun sank to rise again over our friends and family back home, we headed to the  incredible Night Market – pretty much the only game in town – and hand-picked fresh seafood to hold the honor of our evening’s meal that looked something like this:

That about does it. And it was glorious. What a beautiful, poetic way to end our time in the country that blew us away. We loved every stop of our Vietnam adventure: the street-food haven of Hanoi, stunning Halong Bay, adorable and lantern-lit Hoi An, lazy and delectable Dalat, bustling and exhausting Saigon and finally the peaceful retreat of Phu Quoc.

We’ll meet again, Vietnam. But for now, thanks for the memories.

This post is dedicated to my Pho-addicted partner-in-crime. 4 life. Thanks for taking on Vietnam with me – I’m sorry they made us leave.